written by Megan Loden

The holiday season is a time for joy, peace, love, family, laughter…and of course there’s the stress, cooking, cleaning, shopping, wrapping, planning, the list goes on. As someone who deeply holds the traditions we have created as a family around the holiday season I’m officially here to set you free. Consider this your holiday hall pass.

When you have a medically complex kid (or two, in my case) you have to let go of a lot of things. The gift of letting go just isn’t optional anymore. You may find the stress too much to bear. It may be too hard to navigate in the midst of appointments, procedures, and med changes.

That’s OK. Our lives often look different. It looks different than our friends, different from our co-workers, different than we thought it would look. Our lives may not be Pinterest-perfect. And that’s OK, too.

Our girls were diagnosed later in life. They were sixteen years old. We were seasoned Christmas Day hosts for more than fifteen years. We always hosted our family on Christmas day. I actually rather enjoyed the cooking, and the preparations involved in hosting the day. I loved baking and creating fun memories for our extended family. I had actually begun to really love the whole season.

When one of our girls had brain surgery just ten days before Christmas, our festive plans quickly turned into a holiday impossibility. The thought of hosting while managing her post-op recovery was overwhelming to say the least. I knew it would be nearly impossible to get the house ready and we definitely didn’t want to overload our girls so soon after surgery. So, we opted out. Though we did agree that moving our big family Christmas to another day would work out well for everyone, we were all still disappointed.

So, on December 15th our girl had her craniotomy, and we were back at home on the 19th. Watching her recover proved we made the right decision. Girl was TIRED to say the least! The five of us at home just spent the day together. She slept on and off. We watched movies, ate snacks, and relaxed all day.

And do you know what we found when we had everyone over on New Year’s Day to celebrate all together? We found that everyone agreed that it made their own Christmases at home more relaxing, and they actually preferred it this way. So, this year, for the fourth year in a row we are hosting Christmas day with our extended family here on New Years Day. And to be honest, we are all thrilled about it.

As it so happens, the Christmas spirit is just as infectious in January as it is in December! If your holiday season is in desperate need of a refresh, consider this your invite to change it up. It might be just what you need to really enjoy the holidays again!

Megan Loden is a passionate advocate, writer, and mother of medically complex children. In 2020, her twin daughters were diagnosed with familial Cerebral Cavernous Malformations (CCM1), a rare genetic condition.

Her writing, which provides support and encouragement for parents navigating similar challenges, has been featured on various platforms including Twiniversity, Scary Mommy, The Mighty, Bluntmoms, and more. In 2024, Megan’s story was also included in the Becoming Brave Together Anthology, showcasing her resilience and commitment to the rare disease community.

Living with her family just outside Phoenix, Arizona, Megan continues to share her journey through her blog, offering hope and a sense of solidarity to families facing similar struggles. Through her advocacy and storytelling, she strives to make a difference for those affected by rare conditions, bringing visibility and support to this often-overlooked community. For more about Megan’s journey, visit her website, meganloden.com.